Monday, November 14, 2011

"On Fire": QUOTE OF THE DAY (and Then Some!)

“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”---Maureen Dowd

I was sitting here thinking about a topic of conversation that I've been having with more and more *single women* in their late 30s-early 40s about how they are not where they thought they would be. Relationally. And then, I revisited the stats on divorce. Hmm. I wonder how many have preferred the "glass half full" perspective that they, in a good way, represent many of the *married women*, who, *in hindsight*, realized that they were *so desperate* to get married that...they settled. For less. That they are the single women who decided, "I want to be married *one time* the right way rather than one time---or three times---the wrong way." I wonder how many of them have "forgotten" that being single right now, for most, is a choice. Meaning: there were opportunities to settle. THEY. JUST. DIDN'T.

And that's a good---no, GREAT thing!

And then, as a 37-year-old woman, I thought about the times I've settled. *The many times I've settled* and how, when I did that in a relationship, it was a reflection of so many other areas of my life. Just as I was sharing with someone turning 35 earlier today, if nothing else breaks you out of the "settle cycle", let how precious time is do it. *We are to wait on God; not wait on what's less than God's best. And yes, he usually shows us signs to understand the difference*. One of them:

"My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth."---I John 3:18(NKJV)

This means that love is an action word. This means that LOVE. MAKES. PROGRESSIVE. STEPS. If you're in something, and it's godly, it's making *godly progress*. You're (both) *moving forward*. Time is being *mutually honored*. And decisions based on this are being *evidently made*.

Sometimes we're so busy "wanting what we want" that we don't step back to see *if we really want it*. At least in the way that we're getting it (I'm actually penning a devo on that as we speak!). And Maureen is so right: once we're in that space, we end up not just getting less than we should...but even less than that!

Anyway, if you think that's you, I "happened upon" (Proverbs 16:33-AMP) an article with some helpful advice:

"First, acknowledge what settling for less does to a person. When you settle for less, your true desires are not fulfilled. You may learn to accept where you are, but inside you will always have a longing for more and it will slowly eat away at your soul until you act on it.

Next, make a conscious decision not to settle for less. Don’t accept mediocrity. In fact, if you want to be truly happy don’t even accept 'good'. There is a saying: 'learn to say no to the good to allow room for the great.'

Finally, take the necessary actions to change your life. This means moving on from unfulfilling relationships, switching to a satisfying career, etc."

UNFULFILLING. What a fitting word being that King David once blessed us with, "May He grant you according to your heart’s desire, and FULFILL all your purpose." (Psalm 20:4-NKJV) If it is indeed Adonai's will for you to be married (Matthew 19), then it is *a part of your purpose*, which means it will be something that *fulfills you*. This means that it will *satisfy* you. To "satisfy" is not just to "to fulfill the desires, expectations, needs, or demands of (a person, the mind, etc.)", but it will also "GIVE FULL CONTENTMENT TO", it will (love this!) "to put an end to (a desire, want, need, etc.) by sufficient or ample provision" and it will "to give assurance to; convince". Real talk: if you're not seeing evidence of this, YOU ARE SETTLING.

You know, on here, this subject matter came up not too long ago. Adonai *must* be wanting some people to *really get this* before 2012. So often we say that he didn't warn us. When the *free-setting-from-bondage truth* (John 8:32) is...*we just didn't listen* and the "scary thing about that" is: 

"God has no use for the prayers of the people who won't listen to him."---Proverbs 28:9(Message)

Acts 1:7 (Message) indeed does tell us that "Timing is the Father's business." What I'm learning? Is what he *will not change* is what is not *within his will*. And once he makes that *abundantly clear* to keep focusing on it...that is not respecting his timing...*or my time*.

And speaking of time, I have an article to pen, so I'm out. I'll be praying in the meantime, though.

Lech Lecha. *For real*.

"You were bought with a price. Do not become slaves among men." (I Corinthians 7:23-NKJV) AMEN!

SRW

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