All of this. Um...YEAH. Some of y'all have been prayin'. Here is your answer:
"Think about it. If you’re not living the relationship you want or the person isn’t behaving in ways that are conducive to a healthy, mutual relationship, why do you want them?
This is how you get distracted from your values, your purpose, and basically yourself.
It’s important to stop focusing on not being good enough and look specifically at what you’re concerned you’re not good enough about because by putting yourself at conflict with you, you’re undermining everything you’re supposed to represent, desire, and need because you’re not listening and acting in line with your values so that you can do start to do what will actually make you happy, feel good, etc...
When you worry about something that’s in direct conflict with what you profess to want or be, it’s a sign that you’ve stopped listening to yourself and are not being authentic. It’s also a sign of avoidance – how can you be so concerned with something that you don’t want when the issue of what you do want hasn’t been addressed?
Often what we don’t want is tied to something or someone beyond our control. Often what we do want is within our control because ultimately achieving what we want has us in it. When we fear putting what we want on us, it’s easier to focus on everything and everyone else."
Yeah. SOOOOOOOOO DIGGIN' THAT. You can read it in detail here.
If you would like to explore this matter further, this is a book you may want to check out:
It really is true that we often attract to us the kind of people that we are. And, some people remain in a hamster wheel because they are not moving...forward. Anyway, you can get this book here.