Monday, February 13, 2012

"On Fire": THIS Is What the Power of Love Looks Like...


I got an email yesterday from a spiritual brother of mine who has been walking a really...*detailed* journey towards healing. Healing from sexual abuse. Freedom from porn addiction. Deliverance from the sting of divorce.

And just as he was beginning to exhale in a new found love...

A health diagnosis. Stage four cancer. She's not even been given a year.

I was so moved by his "off the cuff" words re: his beloved that, with his permission, I have shared this with a couple of blog outlets. However, being that this particular blog is not just about preparing for love but *discerning* love that is *real*, I thought I'd share it with you gals as well. Sometimes, a lot of energy, on here, is placed on selecting the right man. This is a reminder of what it means to be *his right woman*.

Well done, my friend. Well done.

"There is a song playing over and over in my head today by Kenny Rodgers titled 'She Believes In Me'. The words, over and over again, telling me how she believes me. She has faith in me and she waits for me, her prince. She believes in fairytales and happy endings and I do too... How I wish I could change her world and maybe, just maybe on some special night, the dreams we have will come true.

Sometimes, though, regardless how gallant the prince may be, he may not save the princess.

I've come so far on a journey of healing. Healing from repeated sexual abuse and many many years of porn addiction. I've failed in love and marriage. I struggle to be a good father. I am a good man, however. How do I know? She believes in me. I may never know what she sees in me. That's OK. I have her love and that's enough. That's all I want. That's all I need. That's all I desire.

She is the most beautiful woman in the world to me. I've shown her pictures to others and they all agree she is gorgeous, but that is not what attracted me. It was what was inside her. Her spirit is so beautiful. I want to tell the world of her. How did she become the object of my desires? I was drawn in by the words she has written. For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. Out of the pain and the tragedies in her life she has found the love of God and she has shown it to me.

She knows all of me. I've hidden nothing from her. I have kept nothing back. If ever a woman like her could love a man like me, I have experienced the love, forgiveness and acceptance of God. If I never see her face or kiss her lips, I have experienced the type of love a man desires from a woman. The type of love I've never been able to experience before because through her love I have healed so much. She believes in me.

No one, not even myself, may not understand what she sees in me. They know of my past. They think they know me today. They maybe think that there is no way I've shared all of me and I'm holding out sharing the the ugly side of me and only showing my best side. It is all OK. She doesn't care what others think. I may not be able to change her world, but she has forever changed my life. I may never be able to be with her physically or sexually. I may never be able to marry her for reasons I can't explain right now, but I found something that transcends all of anything I can express in words; how I fell so deeply in love for the first time in my life. I've connected with a woman on a deeper level than I ever thought possible.

I know the years of sexual abuse and porn addiction has taken a toll on me, but just as I have faith in my children and this woman has faith in me. I've had faith in God to heal me and set me free from all the negative affects sexual sin has caused me, the sins of others against me and the sins against my own body, mind and soul.

So I say the love of this woman has done more for me in the past year than anything I've experienced previously all my life. Isn't that what the love of God does? It covers a multitude sins. The love of God has covered me."




Definitely something to think about on this Valentine's Day.

Love to you.


1 comment: