Tuesday, September 25, 2012
"On Fire": DON'T "Man Up"
Will Rogers once said, "All television is children's television." I thought about that when my curiosity got the best of me and I checked out the premiere of Tamar Braxton and her hubby's new "reality" television show. Actually, in the grand scheme of things, it was pretty harmless. I'm just learning to make better use of my time is all. Tamar's got her husband (and *plenty* of money-LOL) already. I've still got work to do in my own backyard.
Oh, but all things do work together. I wish I could quote what Vincent (her husband) said just as he said it, but it would probably be offensive to some and so I'll tweak it...*just a bit*. If you know even just a little bit about Tamar, then you'll gather that a *quiet and gentle spirit* (bookmark that) is not really her, um, selling point (LOL). So, as she was talking a lot *again and some more*, her husband said to her, "Chicks with [a particular male body] part never wins."
That really hit me because I thought about the fact that so many wives these days don't seem to act like the Word says they are to act:
"Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."---I Peter 3:1-4(NKJV)
I also thought about the fact that so many women are reducing themselves to being basically a man with female body parts and perhaps that is just *one more reason why* so many marital covenants are not working the way that God *created* (Genesis 2:24-25, Malachi 2:14) them to. It reminds me of a T-shirt that I saw in a shoe store recently. Personally, I've never liked the "Anything guys can do, girls can do better" motto. I don't want to do *better* than a man. I simply want to be my *best* woman and that would mean following God's formula for womanhood.
That said, I have been a firm believer for some time now that when Proverbs 18:22 tells us that he who finds a wife finds a good thing, that it speaks to a woman being a wife *when* the man notices her as being his helpmate (Genesis 2:18). So, with that said, perhaps one of the reasons why some of us are still single is because God is using this time to, well, *make us wives* in the sense of having the kind of traits that *a godly wife* is supposed to have.
Submissive: of, tending towards, or indicating submission, humility, or servility
Chaste: free from obscenity; decent; virtuous
Gentle: kindly; amiable; not severe, rough, or violent; mild
Quiet-spirited: restrained in speech, manner, etc.free from disturbance or tumult; tranquil; peaceful
This is how a wife is supposed to be. She's supposed to be humble and willing to serve. She's supposed to be free from obscenity and virtuous (which means that even virgins are to be pure in word and deed along with the rest of us). She's supposed to be kind and *not rough*. She's supposed to be mild. She's supposed to be restrained in her speech and a place of tranquility and peacefulness. In short, she's supposed to be what my last (ever) boyfriend says that a wife should be: a sanctuary in the sense of being "a holy place" and "a place of refuge". Indeed, a man should not be in warfare in the world (Ephesians 6:10-20) and then come home to another kind of battlefield. Indeed we, as women, are not just supposed to be a soft place for them to physically touch, but a soft place from them to emotionally land as well; that requires a lot more than a voluptuous body or some comparable sex skills.
I know that in my own life, I have been watching a remarkable internal transformation. Even without my king (yet), I am thankful that God thinks differently than I do (Isaiah 55:8-11)---that even though he created me to be strong and assertive and outspoken and driven, because Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) for the purpose of altering God's perfect will for our lives and our beings, God is taking out the time to love me, my future husband and my covenant enough to refine some areas so that I can be Shellie *and* a good, healthy and godly wife; that one doesn't have to come at the expense of the other. I'm glad that he has been washing the world's jaded perspective of "a strong woman" off of me by allowing me and the Holy Spirit to spend more time together so that I can learn from *the ultimate helper* (John 14:26-AMP) how to be the best kind of helpmate. And yes, as antiquated as it may seem, because God (and his Word) does not change (Malachi 3:6), that would include being a submissive, chaste, gentle and quiet-*spirited* person...even now. Indeed, some of the people in my life he is using to refine me...*even now*.
Another lie that we are told? That it's a man's world. It's not. This is our Father's world (Psalm 90:2) and in the Garden of Eden, he created *man* and *woman* for *distinctly different purposes* for the sake of coming together and making something really beautiful.
Maybe some of us are still single because God is like, "What do you need a man for? You already act like one and I have enough 'Romans 1'going on out here to deal with." Ouch! Oh, but I get it.
James 1:27 tells us that true religion is visiting orphans and widows and remaining unspotted from the world. This would include the world's influence. There's a lot of pressure out here to "man up". Don't do that. Be a woman, *a godly woman*, instead.
It's not like it's second place. Just think about it. We are *so powerful* that we are told to restrain it with submission.
A man can't even compare. (Nor should he have to).