"The king fell in love with Esther far more than with any of his other women or any of the other virgins—he was totally smitten by her. He placed a royal crown on her head and made her queen in place of Vashti. Then the king gave a great banquet for all his nobles and officials—'Esther’s Banquet.' He proclaimed a holiday for all the provinces and handed out gifts with royal generosity."---Esther 2:17-18(Message)
We're back at Esther, I see. Here's why:
There's something really *wonderful* about confirmations. When the Spirit (John 4:24) is really wanting to get something across to you *and* you remain open to his leading, you will usually hear about it more than once. Not because it *has* to be that way but because God, in his infinite wisdom and understanding (Psalm 147:5), knows that many of us have *decided* that we need to hear/see/sense certain things more than once in order for them to *really set in*. For the seed to *really take root*.
So, when I heard a woman say on yesterday, "I don't do 'little relationships'", I must admit that already, I was kinda hooked in. What a profound way of looking at her love life; that some things that people are in *are* relationships, but they are *little ones* and she's so not interested in having one of those:
Little: small in size; not big; not large; tiny; short in duration; not extensive; short; brief; small in amount or degree; not much
How *divine* that she guards her heart (Proverbs 4:23) well enough to know that she is better than being in a "a connection, association, or involvement", "an emotional or other connection between people" or "a sexual involvement; affair" that is not big, that is short in duration, or *not much* of anything. How *wise* of her to also know that she should not consume herself with "alliances", "friendships", "interconnections" or "tie-ins" if they are going to be *not extensive*.
As I was letting that marinate, as I was *pondering* (Proverbs 4:26) over it, then I heard someone say in a film a few hours later: "We accept the love that we think we deserve. Don't make yourself small."
WE ACCEPT THE KIND OF LOVE THAT WE THINK WE DESERVE.
WHEN IT'S LESS THAN GOD'S BEST, WE ARE MAKING OURSELVES *SMALL*.
Small: of limited size; of comparatively restricted dimensions; not big; little; slender, thin, or narrow; not large as compared with others of the same kind; not great in amount, degree, extent, duration, value, etc.
*Wow*. I'll tell you what, looking at definitions of words can change *everything*. When you look at yourself as not being great in value, you might be surprised at the kind of relationships that you'll accept that are not great in degree or duration. It's almost like, so long as you're in *something*, that is enough...when really...it isn't.
A synonym for relationship *is* marriage and so, when it comes to *investing* your mind and heart (and eventually your body-Hebrews 13:4, I Corinthians 6&7) into *that kind* of situation, being that *God created marriage* (Genesis 2:24-25, Matthew 19:6) and God is anything *but* "little" or "small" (Job 36:26), why would (or should) you settle for anything less than BIG LOVE that serves a BIG PURPOSE?
That's why we're back at King Xerses and Esther today. Here was a *pagan husband* who still knew how to *properly express his love* for the woman that he wanted to marry. As we see in the Scripture, he loved her *more* than all of the others *before* he placed the crown on her head. King Xerses loved Esther in a greater quantity, a greater amount and to a greater degree than *any other woman*. And when a man loves a with *that* kind of more...why not act on it?
A LOT OF WOMEN ARE IN RELATIONSHIPS THAT ARE NOT PROGRESSING *BECAUSE* THE MAN THAT THEY "LOVE" SO MUCH DOES NOT LOVE THEM *MORE*.
You see, there is something that a man will do when *more* takes place. He makes decisions. He makes declarations. He makes plans. King Xerses loved Esther *more* and then made her queen and then celebrated her with a party, a holiday and gifts (someone might call that a *wedding ceremony*).
Personally, I discern (Proverbs 2) that a lot of heartache (or is it self-induced drama?) could be spared if a lot more of us had the same resolve as the woman that I mentioned in the beginning.
If you are someone who has *really experienced* manifestations of Adonai's *everlasting love* (and trust me, all of us have-Jeremiah 31:3), then why would you want *so little* after encountering *so much*?
SINCE A BIG GOD WITH BIG LOVE MADE MARRIAGE, DON'T YOU THINK THAT HE CREATED THE LOVE WITHIN IT TO BE...WELL...*BIG*?!?
I John 4:16(NKJV) tells us that "God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him."
So, couldn't that also translate into "God is love and who abides in a godly marriage abides in God and God in him"? And since that is the case, how dare we make a mockery (Galatians 6:7) out of that kind of love by *belittling* it with fornication and shacking up and settling and idolatry and lowering standards and cutting corners and editing the Word and...not accepting that we deserve *so much more*?
I mean...because the Word, which is Adonai (John 1:1), definitely does tell us that we deserve more:
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish."---Ephesians 5:25-27(NKJV)
Personally, I am learning that the *more* I accept how Christ loved, the *more* I don't know how to settle for a lower standard. That kind of love is *far too massive* to "downgrade".
This message was for someone. I know that for sure. Therefore, I encourage you to spend some time over this weekend and ask for wisdom (James 1:5) on if you're in a little relationship...
And if it's time that you started expecting MORE.