Friday, September 27, 2013

An Ounce of Prevention: '9 Signs You’ve Met The One'

OK Y'all...

That's a pretty profound quote right (up) there.

That said, I checked out an article today entitled "9 Signs You've Met the One" and it caught my attention because it seemed *extremely* healthy; especially 1, 5 and 8.

Yet before we get into that, in the effort to prevent someone who I feel is trying to *make someone be "the one"* rather than allow the Spirit to reveal who is God's best for them, I wanted to enclosed this throwback clip from A Different World. It's a classic episode indeed, but what I always liked most is what Dwayne said at the end and Whitley echoed (wait for it). A true, healthy and purposeful relationship is to do just they referenced:

"You taught me how to love." If you're in something that is not maturing you in I Corinthians 13:4-8 while you're striving to do the same for them, then you are not with God's best. *Period*.

That said, here's the list from the article (yeah, really catch that first one!):

1) You’re Not Chasing the Relationship’s Potential

Many people have romantic relationships fraught with obstacles. On a basic level, the relationship is satisfactory, but there always seems to be something standing in the way of true happiness: a stressful job, an annoying ex, a distasteful habit. Both people feel that once the obstacle is removed, they’ll be truly content together.

Unfortunately, relationships don’t work that way. Once the problem is resolved, another one pops up. And—surprise!—the couple is still unhappy.

What people may not realize is that if they are waiting for true happiness in their relationship, then they are in the wrong relationship. Landing a better job may make life easier financially, but no amount of money will help two people who just aren’t a good fit for each other.

The truth is, a happy, well-adjusted couple doesn’t have to chase what could be or should be. A good relationship just is.

2) Who You Are Is Good Enough

3) You Manage Conflict Well

4) The Mundane Is Suddenly Interesting

5) There’s Minimal Drama—or None at All

Like we said above when we talked about conflict, even the healthiest relationships deal with their share of arguments. So when we say that there’s not a lot of drama in your relationship, we don’t mean that the two of you never fight.

But when you do, you do your best to fight fair. You admit when you’re wrong, you listen to each other, you acknowledge one another’s good points, and you apologize when you cross lines. It’s not that you have to be perfect, but if this person is “The One,” then you are at least trying to make your conflict work for your relationship rather than against it.

So if you two are dealing with constant drama, where one of you is trying to create high emotions to manipulate the other or where there’s constant turbulence without some sort of resolution, then be careful about fully committing to the relationship at this point. High drama is a definite red flag when it comes to long-term relationship success.

6) Your Friends and Family See What You See

7) You Know How to Make Them Happy

8) You Have the Same Life Priorities

Opposites may attract, but they rarely make for a good long-term relationship. Compatibility really is key when it comes to creating a deep and lasting connection between two people.

For example, if you want to begin preparing for the future and building toward certain life and career goals, but your partner mainly wants to make enough money so that he or she can party this weekend, then you two are probably working with fairly different priorities.

And the opposite it is true, too: If your priorities match up well, then you two have a much better chance of long-term happiness and fulfillment together.

9) You Respect the Person Deeply

Remember, every God and perfect gift comes from God (James 1:17). That means you need to let the Father bring you to the man (Genesis 2:22) rather than you doing the choosing. And how can you know the difference? Ask God for divine wisdom (James 1:5). He'll show you. (Ecclesiastes 8:5)



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