Wednesday, February 19, 2014
An Ounce of Prevention: 'eHarmony's Ten Favorite Dating Tips for Women'
It takes two people to date, right? (A lot of us could stand to be "on pause" about that revelation alone!) So when it comes to the guy, that quote is a real winner. Women are created to *help* men (Genesis 2:18) but they are not called to *make* them. There's a big difference between the two.
Yet when it comes to what women should keep in mind during the dating process, I do dig the tips in this eHarmony article. It's a straight copy and paste:
It’s all about staying in the moment but learning from the past. Here are some of our favorite dating tips ever…
The Man List
We love the idea of writing down all of the qualities you are looking for - and releasing it to the universe! Knowing what you want is a powerful thing, as is making sure your list gets narrowed down to about ten key qualities (Yes, a list of 153 is too long ladies!).
There's something to be said about having a relaxed, carefree attitude when it comes to dating. You go out several times and then don't hear from him? Instead of worrying and stressing over why - just assume it wasn't meant to be and move on. Save yourself all of that grief and get ready for your next adventure.
Maintain Your Own Identity
You meet a great guy...and drop your entire former life to be with him. This is not good for you or the newfound relationship. Maintaining your sense of self, friendships and passions keeps you balanced and also makes you a more desirable partner.
Trust Your Intuition
Intuition is like a gift from the universe - so don't ignore the feeling in your gut that tells you something isn't right about the seemingly cool guy you just met. Keep those eyes open and listen to your inner self.
How many women are guilty of thinking they could change something about their partners? And how many then learned the hard way that no one can change another person? Odds are he isn't going to change once you move in together or when you get married - or ever. If you just can't accept some trait or habit in your partner, it's time to think about whether this is the right person for you.
"I Complete Me"
There are way too many of us who jump from one relationship to the next, completely uncomfortable with the idea of being alone. Not good. What is great is to be comfortable, confident and happy on your own before you embark on a relationship.
Don't Assume Anything
You've been dating six months and just know you are exclusive. Many of us have learned the hard way that this isn't necessarily true! Ask him what your status is and don't be afraid to express what you are looking for.
Ditch the Comfort Zone
Try something new. If your date wants to go hiking or mountain bike riding, instead of thinking, "Oh no, he'll see me sweaty and gross," try to adopt the "Why not!" attitude. We all grow from doing the things we are afraid to do.
Do Not Settle
You are 35, starting to feel a little stressed that Mr. Right has not come along, so you settle for second best. In the end, you'll be much happier being single than wasting time with the wrong person. Hold out for the one who is right for you.
Learn From the Past
Take some time to really learn why your last relationship didn't work out before you wade into the next one. Is there a common pattern or reason why you struggled? Did you tend to choose a certain type of guy - who wasn't the best for you? Understanding ourselves, and what is good and bad for us, is key to a better dating future.
Yeah, that's good enough to print off and post somewhere!
It's good advice. Hold it close.