Sunday, July 13, 2014
"On Fire": Don't Wait on 'Your Boaz'. Wait on YOUR HUSBAND.
I was catching up with an "On Fire" sistah. As we were talking about...all kinds of stuff, of course the conversation eventually got to relationships. She's 39, a virgin and single. As she was sharing with me how much more comfortable she's getting into her singleness and we were talking about marriage and men in general, one of the things that I said to her was something that I've been meaning to say on here for a minute now.
Although one of my favorite stories in the Bible is that of Boaz and Ruth (simply because I like that Ruth was so, let's say spunky and so I dig that Boaz is referred to as being a "redeemer" which is always a trigger word with me-Ruth 4), I must admit that it still pretty much irks me when women say "I'm waiting on my Boaz".
I mean, every time I hear it, it's about as "I'm thinking that you really didn't think that through when you said it" dumbfounding as when I hear them declaring that they want to be "an Esther". Esther was up in a palace with a whole bunch of women who were dating (and other things because King Xerses was pagan and had "overnight stays" with the women) the same man. And when it comes to Boaz and Ruth? Yeah, reread the story some time. Boaz was a good man; however, Boaz was *extremely passive*. Naomi and Ruth did a ton (A TON) of strategizing and work to win Boaz over. Even to the point of Ruth putting her life in danger (a pagan woman rolling up on a Hebrew man? *In the middle of the night*?!? Yeah...that was beyond bold!).
My point? Words have power (Proverbs 18:21), right? So, when you're making a "I'm waiting on 'my Boaz'" kind of declaration, what exactly are you saying?
Are you simply repeating the cliche' that you've heard so many woman say before?
Are you professing that you want to be the one to do most of the work on the front end?
Are you saying that you desire to put your own life on the line to get a man to notice you?
Are you willing to take such extreme measures?
Because real talk, *that* is what Ruth did...in order to get *her Boaz*.
One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Psalm 33:15(NKJV): "He fashions their hearts individually; He considers all their works." To that, one of my favorite definitions of individual is "distinguished by special, singular, or markedly personal characteristics; exhibiting unique or unusual qualities".
When it comes to the mate God has for you, he takes your (YOUR) special and singular and personal and unique and unusual qualities into account. Boaz and Ruth fit because their individual purposes and hearts fit one another. Oh, but please believe that a passive older man is not every woman's cup of tea. In fact, praise God for his infinite understanding (Psalm 147:5), for providing us the Holy Spirit who does this:
"Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."---Romans 8:26-28(NKJV)
When we say redundant things like "I'm waiting on 'my Boaz'", the Holy Spirit listens to us and is basically like "Girl, please. You are not waiting on the spirit of a dead man. You are waiting on _________ you just don't know it yet. But if you remain obedient, the Lord will lead you to him." Then he turns to God and says "Your daughter was saying some stuff she didn't mean today. Please just keep her patient and focused. Teach her today what she needs to know in order to prepare for her husband. So be it."
So this week, if you're led to pray for your future husband (which is something I recommend single women do on a regular and consistent basis), please refrain from referring to him by another woman's husband's name. God has someone who will fit *your purpose and personality*. Someone that will have you eventually declaring: "Boaz and Ruth have a great love story and..."