Thursday, November 27, 2014
An Ounce of Prevention: 'Take the Focus Off of Them and Bring It Back to You'
Being that this is the time of year when...
A lot of people who are already not thrilled about being single tend to get even more stressed out, I wanted to share a couple of excerpts from an article from my girl that Baggage Reclaim entitled "Take the Focus Off of Them and Bring It Back to You" in the hopes that this can be more of a self-reflection time than anything else:
Our relationships romantic and otherwise, give us a window into understanding who we are and where we need to step up for ourselves. When we find that we’re experiencing the lather, rinse, repeat of the same type of person in a different package and the Groundhog Day of yet another situation that leaves us feeling and thinking a certain way, it’s time to ask:
What am I missing here? What am I overlooking?
If we keep telling ourselves that something that represents loss of self, pain, and an unhealthy dynamic was the “right” thing for us, life will throw more opportunities for that dynamic to come along, either with us going back to a person or taking up with new version of them in a different package. We can’t expect that we will see, appreciate, and ‘get’ somebody or something that represents a different, healthier outlook while on some level insisting that the people, dynamics and things that represent the loss and pain are where we need to be at.
It’s very easy to focus on what another person is doing but use that information to point you to where you can understand and support you better. Take the focus off them and bring it back to you.
Yep. Some relationships were never designed to be anything more than standard setters and lesson learners.
Here's praying that each and every one of us will become wise enough to know the difference.
(And yes, check out the article in its entirety when you get a chance.)