Monday, March 9, 2015
"On Fire": You Deserve a Man Who Is SURE About You.
"You are the most beautiful of women."---Song of Solomon 1:8(NCV)
"My darling, everything about you is beautiful, and there is nothing at all wrong with you."---Song of Solomon 4:7(NCV)
"You are beautiful and pleasant; my love, you are full of delights."---Song of Solomon 7:6(NCV)
I'm pretty sure that at least a few of y'all caught this engagement video over the past several days:
Although it really is such a simple one (which is actually one of the things that I appreciate so much about it; it's *so organic*), what I really like about Dean's proposal to Jennifer is being that he *made the time* to write a note asking her to marry him and then record it for 365 days straight, it means that it also gave him 365 days to think about the fact that he really did want to marry her.
Dean's proposal wasn't impulsive.
*He was sure*.
And you know what?
The more marriage counseling that I do, the more I see that a lot of people *do get married on impulse*...they do *the very thing* that Scripture tells us not to do. They follow what the Word says is "deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked" (their heart) rather than truly seeking God for wisdom (James 1:5) and *his will* (I John 5:14-15).
And really, if there is one place where you should want to do God's will more than just about anywhere else, it would be when it comes to who you vow to be your life partner until death parts you (Ecclesiastes 5:1-7, Matthew 19:6). Why? Because God takes marital covenant and vow-making *a lot more serious* than the world and sadly even the Church does.
When we want to be in a relationship and one of our true desires is to be married, *being that marital covenant is so godly* (Genesis 2:24-25, Matthew 19:1-12), we should not be so quick to assume that Satan is not out to use *every tactic* that he can to *tempt us* towards being the *wrong person*. It makes me think of what James 1:14-15(NKJV) says: "But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren."
In the Garden of Eden, the Woman was *brought to her beloved* (Genesis 2:22).
Outside of the Garden, Satan tries to *draw us away with our own desires *.
In the Garden of Eden, Adam and the Woman's will lined up perfectly with God's.
Outside of the Garden, we should strive to be the exact same way (Joel 2:3).
As I was doing some praying about what should be the "soul food for thought" for today's message, the word "sure" is what came to my spirit. That's actually why those three Scriptures from the Song of Solomon are included at the very top.
For the Shulamite woman's beloved to call her...
For the Shulamite woman's beloved to say that there was...
NOTHING AT ALL WRONG WITH HER
For the Shulamite woman's beloved to say that she was...
FULL OF DELIGHTS
It sounds to me like he wasn't wavering in his feelings about her. He was sure:
Sure: free from doubt as to the reliability, character, action, etc., of something; confident, as of something expected; convinced, fully persuaded, or positive; assured or certain beyond question; worthy of confidence; reliable; stable; unfailing; never disappointing expectations; unerring; never missing, slipping, etc.
He was just the opposite of an episode of one of my favorite shows: A Different World. You can scroll up to 19:58 to get the gist although the entire episode is good (NOTE: I see the video go pulled; looking for another):
Just a little while ago, I read an article that's a real heavy-hitter. It's one that addresses a topic that a lot of people do not want to deal with or accept and that's God's *true stance* on divorce and the possibility of remarriage following divorce (you can read it by clicking here). It confirms the main purpose of this blog and that is to prepare women for marital covenant.
Marriage one-time to God's best.
Marriage one-time to the man who is truly sure.
Marriage one-time to the man you can be truly sure about.
And when you look at all of the definitions of the word "sure", you know what? How can anyone even possibly be sure without God's leading and confirmations? After all, sure is a really (REALLY) big word.
You deserve to be with someone who is free from doubt wanting to be with you.
You deserve to be with someone who is confident in their feelings for you.
You deserve to be with someone who is convinced that you are the only one for them.
You deserve to be with someone who is certain beyond question that the two of you should be one.
You deserve to be with someone who is reliable and stable.
You deserve to be with someone who is unfailing in their commitment.
You deserve to be with someone who strives to never "miss" or "slip".
And you also deserve to be with someone you can feel that way about as well...
The senior couples who I know who are still together, a part of the reason why is not because their marriage is perfect. *No marriage is perfect*. Yet through financial strains, illnesses and even affairs (again, check out that article!), they have remained together. How? Why? Because when they got married they were *sure* that they needed to be together and that surety has kept them intact all of these years.
When you're *sure* that you're with the right one...
When you're *sure* what God says about how to stay married to the right one...
And when you're *sure* that divorce is not an option (and it shouldn't be)...
That's what makes your marriage the exception (a long-lasting covenant)...
And not the general rule (staying when your heart says to and leaving when it says the same).
That's all I got for now.
Love is a beautiful, big and spiritually accountable thing...
Before getting into a serious relationship...
Be sure...*that you're sure*.
And...*be sure that he's sure*.