Tuesday, September 22, 2015
"On Fire": What PURPOSE Does God Want Your Future Marriage to Fulfill?
"They will be my people, and I will be their God. And I will give them one heart and one purpose: to worship me forever, for their own good and for the good of all their descendants. And I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good for them. I will put a desire in their hearts to worship me, and they will never leave me."---Jeremiah 32:38-40(NLT)
I penned a devotional on purpose. Specifically, on really getting to the root of why you're here and and making sure that you make the most of your time fulfilling your purpose (Psalm 20:4).
Being that I tend to have my fair share of conversations with people about purpose (the reason for which something exists or is done, made, used, etc. ) and, interestingly enough, a lot of folks still seem to battle with either discovering their purpose or fully surrendering to what their purpose is, within the devotional, I provided a link to an article that helps to guide people to their purpose. The title is "Life on Purpose: 15 Questions to Discover Your Personal Mission".
If you're someone who wants to learn more about your on purpose, feel free to click on the link to learn more. The exercises are pretty easy and (I think) insightful. However, when it comes to the point and *purpose* of this blog, it was this part of the article that really caught my attention:
Your Personal Mission Statement
"Writing or reviewing a mission statement changes you because it forces you to think through your priorities deeply, carefully, and to align your behavior with your beliefs." Stephen Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
A personal mission consists of 3 parts:
What do I want to do?
Who do I want to help?
What is the result? What value will I create?
Now here's where I'm going with this...
Although a lot of people want to be married, I'm not sure how many A) actually seek God for divine wisdom (James 1:5) about if it's designed, by him, to be a part of their life's purpose (what they were created, by God, to do--Matthew 19:11-12-Message) and B) if they do receive confirmation that marriage is something God wants them to do, that they are praying and preparing for their marriage to be one of purpose:
Purpose: the reason for which something exists or is done, made, used, etc. ; an intended or desired; result; end; aim; goal; determination; resoluteness; the subject in hand; the point at issue; practical result, effect, or advantage
Synonyms: intention, meaning, ambition, aspiration, desire, direction, function, objective, plan, principle, project, scope, target, view, design, destination, dream, hope, mecca, mission, point, proposal, resolve, will, big idea, where one's headed, whole idea
Of course, in the general sense, Scripture let's us know several of marriages purposes:
"Then God said, 'Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.' So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, 'Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.'"---Genesis 1:26-28(NKJV)
"For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed or embarrassed."---Genesis 2:24-25(AMP)
"God made husbands and wives to become one body and one spirit for his purpose---so they would have children who are true to God."---Malachi 2:15(NCV)
Spirit-Guided Relationships: Wives and Husbands
"And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body.
As the Scriptures say, 'A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.' This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."---Ephesians 5:21-33(NLT)
And all of them (ALL OF THEM) are connected to God..
That said, what I'm getting at today is that if you are someone who knows that God has called you to be a wife someday, have you made the time to ask him what the *specific purpose* of what your marriage would be?
Honestly, I discern that this is simply another "dot" that is connecting because remember that earlier this year, I penned a piece on here entitled "Wanna Know What's Next? Ask God to Give Your Love Life a WORD." Basically, it's encouraging you to ask the Lord to provide you with *your own special word* as it relates to how your future beloved will feel about you. Here's an excerpt:
As I was processing some conversations that I've been having with single women (who desire marriage) lately and also been seeking for a few answers about my own journey, this is what I heard the Father say. Clear as "dawn day":
Ask me, *and only me*, for a word to describe how your husband will feel towards you, even before you are his wife. *And then don't settle* until you see that word acted out in a man.
Then he gave me the word. And it's awesome. And rare. A word that I don't really use. Ever.
It's a word that truly will set my husband a part from any other man.
And now, I'm being led (Luke 12:12) to encourage y'all to seek God (Matthew 7:7-8) about the purpose within your marriage. To craft a personal marriage mission statement so-to-speak.
So yeah, sometime this week or weekend, when you have a little downtime, *pray first* (Proverbs 28:9-Message), get out a journal and then ask the Lord the following questions about your marriage:
Lord, what do you want my marriage to do?
Lord, who do you want my marriage to help?
Lord, what do you want the result of my marriage to be? What value will it create?
There are a few benefits that will come from doing this kind of exercise...
One of the main ones is this:
Say for instance that the Lord reveals to you that he desires for your marriage to consist of you and your husband doing missions work. Then say that you meet a guy who wants to take you out but absolutely hates traveling. Um...doesn't that pretty much put him in the platonic category?
Or maybe it's revealed to you that God wants you and your husband to adopt several children (James 1:27) and you find yourself interested in someone who's told you that he never wants to have kids. Why put you or him through weeks or months of connecting when it probably is going to end up at a dead end?
Perhaps it's revealed to you that your marriage is to be about full-time ministry and the guy that you're currently seeing can't stand the thought of doing "church work" or quite possibly living a modest lifestyle when it comes to finances. Why try and talk him into or talk yourself out of what you've heard from the Lord?
Listen, I have sat in numerous marriage counseling sessions with people who *love each other* but really are not like-minded or a complementary fit when it comes to fulfilling purpose. And because we are created, in part, to live out our purpose, that reality ends up bringing with it a deep sense of frustration and resentment.
That's why I like the lead Scripture so much. Although the context of it is speaking of the children of Judah/Israel returning to the Lord, being that spiritually we are to consider ourselves to be "the Tribe of Judah", should it not also apply to us? And if there were a blessing to be placed on our future marriages, isn't it extremely fitting?
God will give our relationship with our future husband, one heart and one purpose.
In our marriage, we will worship God forever---for our own good and the good of our descendants.
In our marriage, God will make a covenant with us.
As a result, in our marriage, God will not stop doing good for us.
In our marriage, we will never stop worshiping God and we will never leave him.
And one of the best ways to worship the Lord...
Is through fulfilling our purpose...
As singles---and then as spouses united to our husbands.
A marriage mission statement is about direction.
A marriage mission statement is about clarity.
A marriage mission statement is about having a plan.
A marriage mission statement will help you to guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23).
A marriage mission statement will help you to know better how to prepare.
A marriage mission statement will help you to better see your husband once he arrives.
A marriage mission statement will reveal more to you about your purpose now and how it will continue to unfold...later...into the future.
Being married is about *so much more* than simply "having a husband".
Please make sure to seek the Father about the purpose that he wants your marriage to fulfill.