Sunday, January 31, 2016

An Ounce of Prevention: Is 'He' a Godsend? Or an IDOL?

http://image.slidesharecdn.com/thea-b-csofboy-girlrelationships-150204060107-conversion-gate02/95/the-a-bc-of-boygirl-relationships-59-638.jpg?cb=1423051481 

 “You shall have no other gods before Me."---Exodus 20:3(NKJV)

"Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s."---I Corinthians 6:18-20(NKJV)

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning."---James 1:17(NKJV) 


A few days ago...

A title of an article caught my attention: "I Never Fell in Love with My Fiancé". I'm personally someone who's not really keen on the phrase "fall in love". I actually have a shirt with this quote from Albert Einstein on it:  "Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love." I was happy to know the author pretty much feels the same way. Here's an excerpt:

What's the point of the romantic scenes without first knowing that your values and goals and general visions of your future align? It would be like buying all the artwork for the 40-story skyscraper that your constructing, before securing the dry wall. Some beautiful stuff is bound to all fall down.

Aliza gave me a powerful quote the other day: You can only love someone as much as you know them. Hollywood romance often turns this around. Fall in love now, ask questions later.

"Fall" in love. The verb alone is enough to make you question it. When in life do we want to "fall"? No control, speeding downwards, just wishing it will work out. Why do we want that for ourselves in the most important relationship of our lives?



I want to change it. Let’s "fly" in love. Yes, it sounds ridiculous and straight out of a commercial for a new perfume by Beyonce, but c’mon, let’s give it a shot. Flying is a choice made with trust and precision. And best of all it is freeing. That sounds much closer to how we feel in a healthy committed relationship.
I realize that just because we learned about each other first and loved each other later doesn't mean we won't make mistakes and still stumble. But I believe that because I have only been talking and listening to my fiancé for the past six months I have, at the very least, set myself up for less stumbles, and have God-willing put us on a trajectory that leads us to true love and genuine respect.
If not, I'll get a rowboat.

People who "fall in love" rather than *fly with trust and precision* are oftentimes those who "go off script" and ignore God's instructions for dating/courtship (2 Timothy 3:16-17). And when that happens, they tend to make the person they are with an idol---whether they choose to accept/realize it or not.

But if you want more signs that 1) fornication is sooooooooooooooooo not a good idea and/or 2) someone may very well be an idol in your life, I'm going to include bullet points from two different articles; starting with the fornication piece (click on the link to read the details):

"Reasons not to fornicate, besides 'God said so'":

It leads to an increased rate of infidelity.
It leads to an increased rate of divorce.
It leads to decreased sexual satisfaction in marriage.
It leads to decreased feelings of romance.
It leads to less love and overall satisfaction in marriage.
It leads to poor decision-making and partner-selection.
Just because it's great now doesn't mean it will be great later.
It creates unnecessary complications in the marriage bed.
It hides existing relationship problems and creates additional ones.
It can make a relationship very unstable.


Followed by "10 Signs You’re Idolizing Something or Someone":

Here are 10 Signs You’re Idolizing Something or Someone:

1. You find your worth and value in them because they give you status, popularity, and power.

2. When you think of your life without them, you feel empty inside.

3. When you’re away from them, they are all you can think about. Night and day, Day and night.

4. You often feel like they give your life purpose. Without them, there’s no you. Does this sound familiar?

5. They have a major influence on the way you feel and think about yourself. They have total control of your self-esteem.

6. Most of your time is consumed by them. If you could, you would spend 24/7 with them. As the saying goes… “You eat, sleep, and breathe” them.

7. You schedule everything around them. You try to squeeze God in wherever you can instead of making Him the priority to begin with.

8. You neglect other important aspects of your life in order to focus on the one thing  that really matters to you.

9. You’d rather put your faith into someone or something other than God.

10. You found yourself nodding throughout this list, reaffirming that you’ve got work to do.


If so, try not to be so focused on material things or relationships that you forget about your relationship with God. Switch the energy you’re currently putting into your distractions and refocus it where it’s needed, on Him!

That’s why it is so important for us to fast from things that we might be giving too much of our attention to and not giving God enough attention. Just remember God is all you need.


Good and perfect gifts come from God AND *God doesn't give us people we're going to put above him*. If you're in a relationship and there is sex involved, your relationship is unhealthy. That person is an idol for you and at the very least, some time apart is needed for healing and balance. If you're not in a relationship, ask the Lord to help you to guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23) in such a way that you'll be able to see if/when you are becoming susceptible to making a new guy your idol, by putting them and their wants/needs above the Lord.

A godsend is going to help you to grow closer to God.
An idol is going to try and replace him.

An idol causes you to fall.
A godsend will cause you to fly.

Please choose wisely!

Proverbs 12:4,

SRW

No comments:

Post a Comment