As I was doing some research for this blog and the marriage devotional series that I do on Thursdays, I "happened upon" (Proverbs 15:33-AMPC) Pastor Andy Stanley, a love, sex and dating series and a *really good point* that he brought up in the first one:
"People don't have 'marriage problems'. When people are single, they have problems and then bring them into the marriage."
Case in point: I was recently counseling a wife who, when she would discuss the issues in her marriage, her voice would raise and an immediate attitude would come up on her. After about the third time of her doing that, I asked "Do you have a submission problem?" BOOOOOOOY. She said "What do you mean? I'm strong-willed like my mom and my grandmother. I'm just not going to tolerate certain things."
Yeah, I'll take that as a "yes" (LOL). *And when we go "off script" from the Bible, there are going to be issues*. Men/husbands did not come up with submission. GOD DID (Colossians 3:17, Ephesians 5:22-24). Not only that, but I Peter 3 speaks to the kind of spirit a wife should have too:
"Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror."---I Peter 3:1-6(NKJV)
If, as a single woman, you have authority issues...
If, as a single woman, you don't know how to be gentle with others (Philippians 4:5)...
If, as a single woman, you don't know when to speak and when to *be quiet*...
How is marriage gonna fix/solve that?
I also like how towards the end of the video, Pastor Stanley addresses something that I say often: "MARRIAGE IS NOT A FAIRY TALE":
Fairy tale: a story, usually for children, about elves, hobgoblins, dragons, fairies, or other magical creatures; an incredible or misleading statement, account, or belief
FAIRY TALES ARE STORIES, USUALLY MISLEADING ONES, THAT ARE TOLD TO CHILDREN. I CORINTHIANS 13:11 SAYS THAT BEING AN ADULT CONSISTS OF PUTTING AWAY CHILDISH THINGS.
Marriages can be awesome and fulfilling and miraculous...
Yet *the main focus* should be helping one another to get to heaven...
Not finding someone to be at your beck and call and check off everything on your "happiness list".
So yes, that point alone in this four-part video series is a good enough reason to go without Netflix one night and check it out.
There are some real gems in here. Please make the time.