This morning, I was watching a video from a married couple that I may have featured on here before. Their last name is Jennings. He's a professional athlete and they have four children. As I was watching the story of how they met, one word came to mind. "RELAXED". And that reminded me of a verse in Scripture that a spiritual sistah once sent me several years ago:
"Relax, everything’s going to be all right; rest, everything’s coming together; open your hearts, love is on the way!"---Jude 1:2(Message)
If you read the context of this verse, it's not marriage. It's telling us that God's love will come to embrace and comfort us. However, it is still relevant for this blog because what we all need to remember is GOD CREATED MARRIAGE (Genesis 2:18-25). This means he knows who should be married and when.
*How many of us really and truly believe that, though?*
I mean, why do you think we're provided verses, in the form of biblical instruction, that tell us things like "BE ANXIOUS FOR NOTHING" (Philippians 4:6-7)? To be anxious is to be "full of mental distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried; solicitous" and "earnestly desirous; eager". The Word tell us NOT to be this way. Marriage is not exempt from the list.
So, why is the Bible so big on being relaxed? Being calm?
I discern it's because when we're in that mindset, it's evidence that we really and truly are "walking by faith and not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7). Here's why I say that:
"On the same day, when evening had come, He said to them, 'Let us cross over to the other side.' Now when they had left the multitude, they took Him along in the boat as He was. And other little boats were also with Him. And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling. But He was in the stern, asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, 'Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?'
Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, 'Peace, be still!' And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. But He said to them, 'Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?' And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, 'Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!'"---Mark 4:35-41(NKJV)
In the storm, Christ was asleep. If we're in Christ, when storms of life come, our spirits should be at rest too, right? Why? Because of our faith in the Lord! After Christ rebuked the wind, told the sea to be at peace and a calm came over the waters, his next action was to ask the disciples---the Word-abiders (John 8:31-32)---"Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?"
Marriage is a faith-based union. Of course it is!
If right now, you're worrying (something else we're told not to do--Matthew 6:25-34) about your relational status or when you'll be married, WHERE IS YOUR FAITH? In what? In God (Mark 11:22).
We as women, we *definitely* need to get calmness down *prior to marriage* because we are called/made/expected to HELP our husbands (Genesis 2:18). If we can't---meaning if we are choosing not to---submit to God himself (James 4:7) in our single state, if can't be content with what he provides (Hebrews 13:5), if we're constantly up in arms with him about wanting a man (something he does not owe us, by the way)...how can he even entrust us to someone who is human...who will make mistakes...who, at times, will fail us.
Yep. Wanna know one sign that you are ready for marriage?
YOUR SPIRIT IS CALM (Proverbs 17:27).
And that's why I like the Jennings so much...
Their story did not happen overnight. It's actually quite sweet and endearing. And as you watch them tell it, they seem at peace. Calm. RELAXED. The way love should be.
This is the fruit of what *healthy love* looks like.
Wanna get ready for your marital future?
Ask God to show you how to RELAX...
And bring love your way...
In HIS time. Not yours. (Ecclesiastes 3:11, Acts 1:7--Message)
Amen. And amen.