Wednesday, June 21, 2017
"On Fire": (MUSIC VIDEO) Your VIRTUE Is a Part of Your BEST (Guys Know That Too!)
"Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God."---I Corinthians 6:9-10(NKJV)
"There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, 'The two become one.' Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never 'become one.' There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modeled love, for 'becoming one' with another. Or didn’t you realize that your body is a sacred place, the place of the Holy Spirit? Don’t you see that you can’t live however you please, squandering what God paid such a high price for? The physical part of you is not some piece of property belonging to the spiritual part of you. God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body."---I Corinthians 6:16-20(Message)
"But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.” ---Revelation 21:8(NKJV)
When people want to have conversations that pertain to sex outside of how it's *biblically-defined to be acceptable* (across the board), I don't debate it (Colossians 2:8---AMPC). Usually, I just provide Scriptures and then simply say, "So, are you saying the Bible is wrong?" It's pretty much a moot issue after that. In the wise words of Charles Spurgeon, "The Word of God is like a lion. You don't have to defend a lion. All you have to do is let the lion loose, and the lion will defend itself." Selah. And amen.
However, even though the Word is *crystal clear* on its stance concerning fornication, homosexuality (Romans 1) and having sex with anyone who isn't your covenant partner (actually, remarriage is the true definition of adultery; interesting how the Seventh Commandment says "Do not COMMIT adultery", right?--Exodus 20:14, Matthew 19:1-12, Romans 7:1-3), and even though the Word also instructs that we're not to have close relationships/interactions with people who claim to be believers yet violate these biblical boundaries (I Corinthians 5)---so many people are dishonoring God, themselves *and* their future spouse via sexual sin.
When I was going through the initial stages of my own sexual detox, two things really helped. Actually, three.
1) The book Sacred Sex: A Spiritual Celebration of Sexual Oneness in Marriage (Tim Alan Gardner)
2) Working with a porn ministry (*that* will make you see sexual sin in a TOTALLY different light!)
3) And, interestingly enough, a song by Mya
Before watching the video, if you're someone who doesn't listen to "secular" music or watching music videos make you feel some type of way, feel free to skip it. Unfortunately, the Church doesn't take on the topic of sex---the blessed side or the "please wait" take---not even close to as much as it should so...inspiration had to be pulled elsewhere.
I'm providing the heads up because...
I remember a woman writing me a few years ago about how offended she was by something I posted on here and *even more* how offended she was that I didn't post her comment about being offended; that she would stop reading the blog if I didn't pull what I posted.
First thing that came to my mind: "You have some serious sensitivity and control issues. I'll be praying for your future husband, for sure." My point? I grew up on all kinds of music. No apologies or regrets. If you didn't, the bottom line of the song is found in the hook:
But oh no I can't let you
Get the best of me
Even though deep inside
Something's dying to see
How you flow out them clothes
Then you put it on me
Feelings coming on strong
I know that it's wrong
I can't let you get the best of me
The BEST of her...
The BEST of you!
Growing up, I was a pretty big Beverly Hills, 90210 fan (minus the fact that, in hindsight, they didn't handle cultural casting or race issues *nearly* as well as they should have; still, I'll catch reruns from time to time). If y'all used to watch it too, then you remember the super couple Donna and David; that Donna was a virgin (well, until her senior year in college anyway). One time, when she was speaking to her priest about wanting to have sex with David, he said something that stuck:
"Your virginity is a gift."
(Keep that in mind please, virgins. Biblically, you're not the "strange" ones; those of us who didn't wait are!)
Another way to look at it is:
"Giving a man your body is giving him some of your VERY BEST."
Best: of the highest quality, excellence, or standing; most excellently or suitably; with most advantage or success
Synonyms: finest, first-rate, outstanding, perfect, terrific, cool, optimum, premium, primo, super, beyond compare, greatest, highest, incomparable, matchless, number 1, out-of-sight, paramount, second to none, supreme, unsurpassed
"Every good gift and every perfect (free, large, full) gift is from above; it comes down from the Father of all [that gives] light, in [the shining of] Whom there can be no variation [rising or setting] or shadow cast by His turning [as in an eclipse]."---James 1:17(AMPC)
Can you just imagine what this world would look like if everyone had waited until marriage to have sex *and then* remained with that one person until death?! Frankly, I don't know if Satan would've been able to pull off 75 percent of what he has. *Of what we've allowed him to have*.
Meanwhile, when GOD came up with the BEAUTIFUL GIFT known as sex, in his mind and according to his plan/desire/will, ONLY AFTER a man *paid vows* (Ecclesiastes 5:1-7, Job 22:27, Psalm 50:14), both to him and to you, ONLY THEN, does God release you---with joy and pleasure (Psalm 16:11)---to be one with your husband (Genesis 2:24-25, Matthew 19:4-6, Hebrews 13:4) and to have PLENTY of sex (I Corinthians 7:1-5--AMPC)!
NOT. ONE. MOMENT. BEFORE.
In part, because...
Your body is a gift.
Your body is a part of your absolute best.
ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS DESERVING BUT YOUR HUSBAND.
There's something else to this...
Several years ago, I met a guy who's all kinds of fine. Too young for my liking (27 now; I'm 43) but eye candy nonetheless. He's also smart, cultured, ambitious, sweet and community-service-driven. Overall, a great catch on many levels. He's also a self-professed atheist.
Or at least, until last week, he was...
It's kind of a long story, but over the past several months, God has made sure that "Mr. Fine" would meet all kinds of people. People who would make a really HUGE impact on his life.
Adding to that...
A few weeks ago, Mr. Fine asked if he could take me to lunch. There he said something that really moved me. He told me that he had been so used to hypocritical Christians (including some that are in his own family), that my abstinence commitment impressed him...and helped him to consider "giving God a try". Last night, he called to wish me "Happy Belated" as he told me that he gave his heart to Christ!
Proverbs 31:10(AMPC) says, "A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman—who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls."
Virtue is valuable.
Virtue is precious.
VIRTUE IS EXPENSIVE.
God doesn't only look to us to live virtuous lives for us for his glory.
God doesn't only tell us to live virtuous lives to honor our future husband.
God also tells us to live virtuous lives to be a light and witness to others!
Believers Are Salt and Light
“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men.
You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."---Matthew 5:13-16(NKJV)
Sexual sin comes with some pretty severe consequences...
I Corinthians 6 tells us that it can prevent us from inheriting the kingdom of heaven...
Revelation 21 says that if it goes non-repented, hell is the penalty.
Please don't allow this world, the one that is FILLED with NOTHING but LUST and PRIDE (I John 2:16) to deceive you (Matthew 24:4). GOD TAKES SEX VERY SERIOUSLY!
As a single woman, use your virtue (sexual purity/abstinence) as a way to shine light in the world as you further prepare for your husband. When people ask me if I would consider a past sexual partner, honestly, the answer is "no". I call doing that "regifting" (LOL). Not everyone feels that way and most certainly, after repenting (I John 1:9-10) and confessing (James 5:16), a couple who has sinned against one another can be healed/restored. I will say this, though: I don't know ONE COUPLE who had sex with each other prior to marriage who do not DEEPLY REGRET IT and end up having some "Wow...where did *that* come from?!" consequences (Galatians 6:7-8) transpire as a result. CHOOSE WISELY. Besides, just imagine what your wedding night will be like if you wait---no "reruns" (LOL). Just this: Anticipation. Joy. Excitement. Peace. God's blessing and rewards for your holiness and faithfulness!
And, as a married woman (someday)...just remember that what you are giving your husband is YOUR ABSOLUTE BEST. NO MAN DESERVES THE BEST OF YOU BUT THE MAN WHO IS GOING TO GIVE YOU THE BEST OF HIM: A MARITAL COVENANT.
It took me a while to really "get this" yet what I've realized is that participating sexual sin is a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. Since the Word PROMISES us that for every temptation, an escape is provided (I Corinthians 10:13), one of those is having a renewed/transformed (Romans 12:2) mind. When you see your good stuff as being THE BEST, while you have moments of missing sex (or wanting/being super curious about it if you've never had it before), it's not enough to give someone who doesn't deserve it..."it".
Whether you personally like Mya or don't, she was onto something with that song.
No matter what, *no man* but your husband should *ever* get the BEST OF YOU! EVER.
His Purpose, His Presence, His Peace...